Raw Thoughts - Caught before they Fly Away..!!!

Day - One

Do not know why I am writing, I am writing right now cause I guess I have nothing else to do.

But now that I have written the first line, I think what better than writing down my thoughts, atleast now they are real, cause they are now in Black & White.

My thoughts - Am I really gonna write my thoughts, or I am just fucking with my mind and trying to make a fool of you (Yeah You - who have reached here to read this crazy blog).

I think about a lot of things that happen around us, Yesterday - 11th March, 2011 - Japan was struck with a devasting Natural Catastrophe. A massive Earthquake, triggering a monstrous Tsunami. My heart - felt the ripples, glimpses of the Movie 2012 came to my mind, turning into a reality.

Thoughts of the ever spoken Nostradamous Prophecy - The Apocalypse came to my mind.

The movie had a brilliant line - it is sketched in my heart - "World as we know it, will soon come to an end"

Then suddenly my mind shifted from this intriguing worldly disorder to the lesser important thing when compared to the larger happenings - My Life.

I am at the verge of uncertainties, with my life.

Oh.. Let me tell you who I am - A libran at heart - Loves to love, hates to be brought down, I dream unlimited. I have a job at a Multi National Corporation. I am a part of the Swiss Bank Offshoring Team doing there Investment Banking stuff sitting here in India.

Now, its been 3 years, no let me be edgingly precise - 3yrs & 3 months doing this corporate shit.

I am tired of it. I live away from home, alone.

I do not care about anybody here, nor does anybody care about me - Its a healthy proposition that ways. However, I do not like it.

As I earlier said, I love dreaming - But to tell you the truth, most of them are when I have my eyes wide open.

I wanna create - the big question is what - Money? Naaahhh... Art? Well sort off !!! I guess with me the Hardest thing is to stick to a single thing.

I am being honest.

I have tried my luck at quite a lot of things, have fared somewhat average in all of them, the sad thing, never been the Man in any of them. I am one of those lost in trying to do too many things.

I am the one of You.

I am what I think is a guy who doesn't know. I guess I should be happy, for I have a decent enough job, but then many more have jobs better than me - Thats probably Jealousy? Is it?

But then I think of the others who will do anything to have my job, have my pay, have my lifestyle.

I know some certain things, that I dont like what I am doing, sadly I do not know either what should I be doing.

I keep having these intense conversations with my friends - and as I told you before, I have been in too many things, so they see a lot of potential in me.

There comes the killing part. People who love me have faith in me, where do I go to find that faith in myself.

I am waiting for life to strike to me. But am I gonna do something about it. Do i have it in me to put the pieces together and solve this Jumble game - called Life.

I guess we will all have to wait and see.